If Ghosts Were Real, Physics Would Be Having a Very Bad Day

I’ve been drawn to horror since I was a kid. Not just the jump-scare stuff, but the kind of horror that leans on mood, tension, and mystery—Fatal Frame, Echo Night, that sort of thing. The ones where the creepiest thing isn’t a monster you can fight, but the feeling that something unseen is watching you. Sci-fi horror like Resident Evil is fun, sure, but it’s a different beast—zombies, mutations, lab experiments gone wrong. I enjoy supernatural horror for the thrill, but when it comes to believing in ghosts... well, I don’t. Never really did.

Still, it’s hard not to wonder why ghost stories persist. Are they just the product of overactive imaginations, or is there something else? And if ghosts are real, why do they seem to behave in such absurd ways?

Science hasn’t found any reliable evidence for ghosts. Nothing that holds up to testing. Those sudden chills, noises in empty rooms, or the feeling of “someone watching you”? Most of the time, there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation—psychology, sleep paralysis, optical illusions, electromagnetic interference, or just quirks of the environment. The human brain is surprisingly good at seeing patterns where none exist. I see it, I get it, it happens.

Consider this: ghosts supposedly pass through walls but walk on floors without falling through. That would require some new law of physics we haven’t discovered yet. And if we could prove it? Nobel Prize material, probably. Feels a little ridiculous, but still, it’s funny to think about.

When tested under scientific conditions, every ghost claim comes up empty. Zero results. TikTok ghost hunters aside, the Nobel committee seems safe for now.

Some suggest ghosts come from other dimensions, citing string theory and its multiple dimensions. Sounds intriguing, but those dimensions are theoretical, mathematical constructs—not secret apartments for spirits. And even if ghosts were interdimensional, they’d still have to obey the physics of their own realm. Passing through walls while not falling through the floor? Doesn’t really add up.

Then there’s the matter of ghost sounds. Sound is just air vibrations. If a ghost talks or makes noises, that implies some physical interaction. Which would mean they have mass. And if they have mass then technically, you could hit them. Not that I would, but it’s something to think about.

It’s also odd that ghosts seem to communicate only in ways humans can perceive. Why not in frequencies only dogs hear? Or over radio waves? Imagine a ghost trying to broadcast on the local radio: “Hey, can someone return my wallet?” Most likely, what we perceive as ghostly sounds are environmental noises, auditory hallucinations, or natural infrasound playing tricks on the brain.

People often claim ghosts are spirits of deceased humans. But if that were true, why do they act so strange? People die, and suddenly they’re moving objects, appearing halfway in mirrors, or making noises with no purpose. If ghosts could possess someone, why not just inhabit their own body before it’s buried, or take over a corpse? And the clothing thing... do ghosts even wear clothes, or is that just our imagination? Seems like a human projection more than anything real.

If ghosts existed and we could study them scientifically, the possibilities would be wild. They don’t need food, they don’t get tired—so in theory, we could harness that energy. Sensors in a “haunted” building could convert their movements into electricity. No need for nuclear plants or solar panels. It sounds ridiculous, but imagining a ghost-powered generator is kind of fun.

Offerings are another curious thing. In some cultures, people leave bananas, coffee, or coconuts for spirits. If ghosts needed that, do they digest it? Poop it? And if they could get food themselves, why rely on offerings? Seems more like tradition than necessity. From a scientific perspective, offerings are cultural practices, not ghostly requirements.

And think about it: if ghosts were real, why aren’t they helping us understand the universe? Ghost Einstein showing up to explain unified physics? Ghost astronauts reporting alien life? Instead, they just scare people.

At the end of the day, ghosts make for great stories, culture, and psychological thrills. Watching someone react to the unexplainable can be endlessly entertaining. But personally? I lean toward science. And if ghosts exist, well, I’d at least want to ask one: “Where’d you get that outfit?” And if punching were an option, I might be first in line.